~> ego.nuggit.nu <~ mng/cmt

This is an archive of journals from late high school. A bit like a diary, this was a personal fork off of my senior project at the time to build a fully functioning blog site that people could sign up for, manage, and etc. I managed to recover all the posts, but I apparently forgot to back up the comments and attached music tables before repurposing my personal server, so those are mostly gone. This is a little embarrassing but not as awful as my old Geocities/tcn.heathenkitties.net early high school journals.

So it's late, you're alone, and you feel odd...

2008-07-01 00:34:18 Category: Intarwebs

(There used to be a music track attached to this post, but the information for it has since been lost.)

it's time to watch these movies.You've got nothing better to do anyway, just watch them. Preferably on your own while everyone else is asleep or gone out, for the effect.
I don't know, I find them haunting and fascinating.




Want more creepy and/or weird videos? Search youtube for Tom Rubnitz, acid trip, or Kinder surprise. There are also the "youtube poops". There are tons of those out there. No, I'm not sure why they call them poops, but they don't usually contain feces.

Good rest of the night.

PS. That song I attached is one of my favorites by BoC. :)
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2008-06-29 18:38:34 Category: IRL Log
Work was not rewarding. Work was not fun. I did not leave work with a :3 on my face. That's how it was over the winter/spring, banquet season, when we'd serve fancy meals to adults and I would act all polite with professionalface and nice white shirt and black pants and apron and shiny black shoes--although there's obviously more pressure to be professional and high quality in general, it wasn't that awful, and at the end of the day I would leave feeling like I genuinely helped. Great feeling. I mean, that's the feeling I live for.

But today was crap. I'd never done mornings before, and it was like my fifth time leading? I suck as a lead. I do. Especially when I'm leading two (yeah, only two--one person didn't even come in today) slow and/or unexperienced workers. I shouldn't be a lead--I'm obviously not quite there yet, and it's not like I get any sort of pay raise. Why should I get this responsibility? I don't want it if I'm not going to get paid for it accordingly. I was fine on the bottom rung and I'm leaving after this summer anyway. Last night was shit too--was shooting for being done at nine but I had to stay til about 10. I didn't mind the fact that I was working all on my own that last hour there, tying up loose ends in closing up the place, not feeling as pressured by the presence of others... so I felt not completely horrible because at least the place wasn't a complete mess. There were definitely some things unfinished but I figured since I was going to be there in the morning I'd just take care of it then. Hahaha.

I despise doing mornings, which is why I never work them. I thank the scheduler for usually never giving me the morning shifts.

I was going to complain some more in specifics about today, but I don't even feel like typing them out.

My mood today went from anxious to stressed to heart-wrenching guilt to complete apathy. I hit the bottom in spirit about 3 hours before I finally clocked out. I'm just glad I'm home now. I'm going to listen to Boards of Canada and self-indulge on the netz. That will cure me right up. I've got the next three days off, too.

So it's all good.

I'm going to talk to ze boss sometime.


This is my cure. :)

Boards of Canada! :D <33
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Peanut butter and molasses: a suggestion.

2008-06-18 22:18:13 Category: Pics

Makes a yummy protein+energy fix.
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My first woot

2008-06-05 09:18:54 Category: Intarwebs
Justice - "Newjack"
So on May 26, I went to someone's Myspace and saw "shirt.woot.com" and suddenly I remembered how awesome that site was. Then I spent like an hour just browsing around and catching up. I saw a shirt that was up for "reckoning" (the designs only stay for sale if they're popular) and was immediately enamored. Faders and Meters. $15.

After staring for some minutes, I turned to my daddy and asked if I could use his credit card to buy a shirt for $15 if I paid him back, and he said yes. c:

I've been tracking the course of the package every couple days to see when it might get here--it traveled from Texas to California, skipped Oregon, and is now circling within Washington. Gah! The suspense!

It's good that I found shirt.woot, because I've been needing more T-shirts. I've been peeking at ISO50's designs every month or so to keep up my list of shirts I want, but they cost so much... a similar shirt by him called "Sound System" cost $7 more than $15, i.e. $22. Maybe it's better design, maybe it's more authentic looking. Yeah. But I'm a sucker for low prices, and that's what woot gives you. Their daily T-shirts only cost $10. If I had gotten to shirt.woot a few days earlier I would have snagged that shirt for $10. Plus, I'm generally turned off by words on my shirts. I always feel like I'm advertising.

Not that I don't advertise things on my blog. :/
I wish I got free tees for this.

Shirt.woot blogged today about Justice's awesome music video for "D.A.N.C.E." which you should see as well to get into that "Look at my shirt, I'm so hip" mood.
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Youtube comments

2008-05-31 22:37:02 Category: Intarwebs
A monkey feeding itself with prosthetic limbs using signals only from its brain.
I found it on reddit. (I've been browsing reddit all day. I love it!) I clicked, watched it, aww'd, then scrolled down to the comments.
Here are the first three comments I saw.
  • One day we all going to be robots,how sad?
  • its funny how you aren't able to see the "top" of the monkeys head.....hmmm, cuz its brain is exposed????!!! Nasty!!!
  • That monkey seems to be GAAAAY! He's licking a robot DONG!

Youtube comments never cease to amaze me. It's as if the lowest of the low and the "special" class are having an endless debate.
--robdag2 on reddit.com
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Today's profits

2008-05-29 21:48:39 Category: IRL Log
Blonde Redhead - "Silently" 3:57
12 hours of sleep and an interesting dream.

Waffles for breakfast.

Late to school.

Button fell off my cuff.

Chemistry test. Possibly a grade-raiser.

Delicious chips at book club.

Got to take home leftover cookies, chips, and jug of yummy apple juice.

Found a quarter in the parking lot.

Spilled cookie crumbs all over car seat.

Arrived home to discover I'd forgotten to set the apple juice in the car... which explains the odd thunk I heard when I turned a corner and the weird looks I got from people during the first part of my trip home with a jug of juice riding the roof of my car.
- - - - -
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My old txtpad

2008-05-29 13:39:45 Category: Site Related

I made it a year and a half ago. :] My first ever PHP widget!
I've used it a lot. I have one on nuggit.nu now, too. I had to make one here because Ripway got b& by the stupid school ISP (who also bans 4chan but not 7chan, which I find interesting) for "filesharing". What the hell, like anyone's going to pirate music and pr0nz at school from Ripway? They don't even have a search feature.

Anyway. Yeah, so it's like an online Notepad using txt files (because on Ripway I couldn't MySQL... but this taught me how to handle files in PHP, which was cool). And I have a simple password system for saving. But, since I don't care if people look at my files but I don't really want people spamming by making 234809 new files (and the opening and creating uses the same function) I used a dinky little password check using Javascript when you make a new file.

All Javascript. Which means you can just view the source code of the page and you can find the password right there between <script> and </script>. Well, whatever.

This morning I happened to go to Ripway to look at an old file I had over there, and in the file list I found a new file titled "hacked". I opened it... blank. Ahhh, someone had "hacked" my little txtpad. I checked Ripway and apparently it happened back on April 16th. I left a note in the file though I highly doubt whoever did it is going to come back.

In any case,
I feel kind of special.
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Ew. it's Gaia.

2008-05-26 15:42:18 Category: Intarwebs
Awwww, I'd forgotten about this. I made this for my sig back when I was really active in Polls Galore, the second biggest guild on Gaia, which was full of awesome for me at the time. Norly, it was a really cool place to hang out and talk about whatever, and everyone there was so nice and fun. (And then I gradually hardened and that place wasn't suitable for me anymore :/ Geh.)
Ew. It's thechickennuggit.
Get it? Get it?! I dressed the weird chicken nugget like my little avatar. Hehe, I got a lot of compliments on my sig. I just found the cute base picture by image googling. I have no idea who that boy is, but he was all over my internets back then.

Oh, the nostalgia. It almost makes me want to log into Gaia again.
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Chemistry faces

2008-05-24 21:06:46 Category: Pics
Jasmon - "Somasomasu" 4:56

More from Chemistry.

The ones on the left are attempts at drawing the substitute teacher. He looked kind of interesting, like a little boy ("bocchan") but old and wrinkly. He used to be a math teacher. The way he spoke was kind of ineffective, because he'd say a phrase, then pause for a few full seconds, then continue with his sentence, pause again, and so on. I tried to draw him quickly but it ended up looking like the KFC man, so I drew another one that was more like a caricature in that it emphasized his features more: lidded eyes, no eyebrows, and a deadpan expression. Meh.

The one on the right? Not much to say about that, but I like it.
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2008-05-24 11:54:39 Category: Intarwebs
Tycho - "Adrift"
Tycho posted samples of his new EP on his blog, and the comments that followed were generally like omgscottisagenius. And yeah, I could listen to his stuff all day long. But criticism is interesting to hear too, so when I started reading this comment, I was genuinely interested to hear what he had to say... but uh... well, just look at it.
i hate to be a party pooper and i’ll try and word this as respectfully as i can…hopefully without coming off as a pretentious and windy douche(and of course this is only my little opinion in a big sea of supporters)..but……i’m perplexed at how derivative tycho stuff is. i know, i’m missing the point…maybe it’s “just music”, a background that doesn’t really mean much and isn’t meant to be held to a standard or not taken seriously as an expression of your original self. i’ll admit i haven’t listened to every single tycho piece, but i’ve heard quite a bit. enough that it’s awfully familiar. i appreciate that influences are huge and inspiring to everyone’s art and that it’s natural to nick things from these influences, but the point, at least in my view, is progession & growth; to take those nuggets of inspiration and transcend towards something that’s comfortably(or uncomfortably depending on your goals)your own…something that’s tangibly original and unique and you. i just hear way too much of eoin/sandison to be convinced you’ve worked the influence of them fully through. and maybe you don’t want too, which is fine. i noticed the recent post of them and i’d be flabbergasted to learn you don’t count them as a primary influence in your music (or visual art for that matter).
btw…the cover is very nice(and i mean that devoid of any sarcasm or anything remotely smarmy…really…it’s wicked).

No, really. What did he just say? Nothing?


So I'm going to pick this apart now, pick out the parts where he might be saying something.
  • i’m perplexed at how derivative tycho stuff is
  • maybe it’s “just music”, a background that doesn’t really mean much and isn’t meant to be held to a standard or not taken seriously as an expression of your original self
  • influences are huge and inspiring to everyone’s art and that it’s natural to nick things
  • i just hear way too much of eoin/sandison to be convinced you’ve worked the influence of them fully through
Okay okay, he's saying that Tycho sounds too much like Boards of Canada, and that it would be nice to hear Tycho developing a more unique sound of his own. Alright, got it.

What he's saying does not annoy me at all. I can totally see how people would think Tycho is copying Boards of Canada, though personally I think Scott does add a lot of himself in his music along with the BoC influence. What annoys me is his communication. There's so much I could red-pen.

If you're going to say something, say it, and stop being so damn nonoffensive and purposefully unclear. It's offensive in itself.
Of course he's not a troll, but if he was, then I've been massively, incredibly trolled. c:

On a lighter note, this is Scott's (ISO50/Tycho) blog. <3 Great art everywhere you look.
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2008-05-23 04:06:25 Category: Pics
Not exactly sure what I was trying to do, but uh, yay for swirly black and white hair!

Chemistry sometime last week. I think it annoyed the teacher. He popped some questions on me while I was drawing this.
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Wednesday on my mind

2008-05-23 03:52:23 Category: Pics

Doodling in English.
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Sometimes, for no reason at all,

2008-05-22 18:04:26 Category: Crap
I feel like


But no, I'm calm, I'm happy, etc etc.
I don't even flinch.
But jesus christ. My blood is rushing and I have no reason to punch anyone or anything. Moreover, I do not punch. I do not yell. I don't get angry. Why should I be angry?

I want to punch babies.
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Caught in the high beams

2008-05-19 21:50:29 Category: Music
Atmosphere - "Godlovesugly" 3:50
Once in a while I get in a rap mood. I don't know why or how, it's kind of random, but it happens. I do listen to hip hoppish IDM like Cex and Prefuse 73 fairly often. But yeah. It's kind of a jump.

But this is good stuff!

Atmosphere--I've loved his work for years, and I downloaded his albums over the winter, but never listened to them wholly. I'm listening to God Loves Ugly now and it's not bad. But the title track, Godlovesugly... I cannot get over that last part of the song. His rhymes and imagery are mesmerizing.

why scream, when you can lose yourself inside the wide-screen
let life be a bowl of melted ice cream
or be the deer thats caught in my high beams
im rollin with the lights on, scared stiff
reality is just too much to bear with
paranoid, walkin around careless
no wonder youre in love with your therapist
go to sleep my little time bomb

Just noticed an interesting connection though--I tend to love songs that mention going to sleep. I was obsessed with APC's song Pet back in my young teen days, where Maynard whispers "Go back to sleep." I still have a deep fondness for the Theivery Corporation's song "Until the Morning" where Emiliana Torrini croons "Sleep on tight..."
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2008-05-17 02:15:50 Category: Literature
It was dark. My parents were asleep. But I had things to do. I sat on the floor in the area between the livingroom and hallway. I picked up the phone and dialed a number, but when it was picked up, there was silence. "Hello?" I said. Nothing. Was anyone listening? "Hello?" I asked again. I held it and listened. Then finally, a distant-sounding voice came through, an exasperated sounding woman: "Hello?!" "Hello," I said. "Hello?!" she said again. My mouth was open. Could she hear anything I said? Was she even there? It sounded like a recording...

I hung up.

Immediately, the phone rang. I grabbed it, not wanting to wake my parents. "Hello?"

After a moment, a man's voice answered hello. "Hello?" I asked again. Then a woman's voice. A torrent of "Hello?"s rushed out from the receiver all from different people, and I could not answer to each one--I hung up, and the phone rang again, same thing. I was scared. Who were all these people? Why were they recorded? Why were they calling me?

When the phone rang again, I pressed a button to hang up on it. It immediately rang again. I could not press the button fast enough. I wondered why my parents weren't up to see what this was all about. I hoped it wasn't bothering them too much.

I picked up the receiver again, and it was the same torrent of Hellos. "Hello?" I tried. "Hello? Hello?!"

"Hello," said a mechanical voice behind me. I whired around and saw
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